a wordy explanation but not an apology.

9.12.2013

I understand that I made a blunt accusation towards a group yesterday without much explanation. Though I stand by what I said yesterday, I thought I would expound.

Feminism. It's a topic that most have a definitive opinion about. I think being a lady is lovely. I also think being treated like a human, regardless of my gender is lovely. If you want to be a business woman, a mother, or both- go for it. I think that the opportunities for women in that regard should be equal.

However,

Men & women are not the same. Honey, you've got a V & he has a P. Apples & oranges are both fruit but they aren't the same. It's not a bad thing.

My "feminists, go back to the hole you crawled out of" comment" wasn't directed to the masses. I was chatting with a few friends about a protest that a group is planning for General Conference this coming October. A group of LDS women who think that they should be ordained with the Priesthood for the sake of equality.

These women claim that they are faithful members, understand the doctrine of the church & sustain the leaders. Oh, how I adore contradiction!

As a member of the church, I still believe in the equality of men & women. I don't think it's wildly unfair that men & women have different roles in the church. Men have the opportunity to have the Priesthood & women have the opportunity to have children. It's not about equality. It's not to offend.

These women don't understand these different roles. It's not to belittle or to lessen you as a woman. You, as a woman, have roles that men cannot fulfill. It's not a competition of the genders. We work together. Oh, how I wish these protesting women would spend all of their moronic efforts somewhere else. Perhaps educating themselves on the religion they supposedly support. If you don't like it, there's the door.

For the majority of women, high five to you. High five to us. If you choose not to change your last name when you get married because you can do whatever you want, awesome. Wear pants to church, whatever. Embrace your bits. Be proud of your estrogen. Be a CEO. Be a mother. Be whatever you want. I just don't care. You're a person & I don't care what gender you are.

50 comments :

  1. i agree.
    the mormon feminist movements really erk me.
    i think that if the gospel was understood better than they would understand that they are still equal, just with different rolls.

    K

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  2. Just because you feel that the mormon gender roles are not wildly unfair and women should not hold the priesthood doesn't mean that other people are not entitled to feel differently. It's not that these women don't understand their religion, they understand it very well in fact. Asking them to leave because they don't share your opinion is "moronic" if you ask me. We are a church of continuing revelation, where questioning is encouraged because it leads to further knowledge and opens the doors to even more revelation. Just because someone is questioning something doesn't mean they are wrong or bad, or need to give up on the church all together and leave. I don't believe that is the attitude that Christ would take.

    I take no offense to your opinion, you are entitled to think and believe how you feel you should. I do believe that there is a way to share that opinion in a kinder way. Wouldn't it be great if we could have more open discussions about these issues without telling women that they just don't understand their role and should go find another church.

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    1. Questioning is one thing. Protesting against the church is another.

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    2. They aren't gathering to protest, just to see if they can go into the Priesthood session. What is so wrong with that? They are asking to be heard. Again, Teeny, differences of opinion do not mean these women do not understand the church or make them any less of a righteous LDS member. If this isn't the time or the place, then when is?

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    3. Danielle, I see where you are coming from. It's sometimes frustrating not knowing why God does some of the things he does (i.e. only ordaining men with HIS priesthood.) But I encourage you to read this recent talk by Elder M. Russell Ballard (http://www.lds.org/church/news/elder-ballard-speaks-about-the-role-of-women-at-education-week?lang=eng) It gave me a lot of comfort and a better understanding.

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    4. Thanks Danielle. I personally won't be joining the group attending Priesthood as I have prayed about it and don't personally feel the need to get involved at this time, but who am I to tell another woman what she does or does not feel? What she has or has not received in an answer to a heartfelt prayer? I think questioning is healthy and there's nothing forceful about a group of women asking, seeking, and knocking to attend the Priesthood meeting. If they are not permitted to attend, then they will kindly leave, I am sure. Hardly a protest.

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    5. Do you see men trying to come to the General Relief Society broadcast? No. Priesthood session is available to listen and read to all just like the rest of conference. Don't like her opinion? don't read the blog. problem solved. not worth an argument in the comment section

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    6. I was not trying to cause an argument, just offer a differing opinion. I'm sorry if I offended anyone as that was never my intentions.

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    7. Revelation for the Church cannot come through anyone. We have been counseled to listen strictly to those that have the power of revelation for all the members of the church. That includes only the Prophet and Apostles. If God sees it to be right we will hear about it from the Prophet. No one else. We do not protest God. And questioning and protesting our Prophet is the same thing.

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    8. "Is it all right to have questions about the Church or its doctrine? My dear young friends, we are a question-asking people because we know that inquiry leads to truth. That is the way the Church got its start—from a young man who had questions. In fact, I’m not sure how one can discover truth without asking questions. In the scriptures you will rarely discover a revelation that didn’t come in response to a question. Whenever a question arose and Joseph Smith wasn’t sure of the answer, he approached the Lord, and the results are the wonderful revelations in the Doctrine and Covenants. Often the knowledge Joseph received extended far beyond the original question. That is because not only can the Lord answer the questions we ask but, even more importantly, He can give us answers to questions we should have asked." - President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

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  3. I agree 110% with this post!! And Danielle, if these women TRULY understand the church that they choose to follow, they would understand the reason why men have their roles and why women have theirs. Protesting out front of the church they claim to love is NO way to "question" these things. There is a time, a place, and a way. It's actually sad, that these women think its okay to do such a thing, during something that means so much to so many other members. Good for you, Meg, for expressing your opinion!!

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  4. I concur. I wrote a small snippet like the one you did in your last blog post on my blog a while ago and I got eaten alive. Apparently only feminists get to have an opinion and those of us who disagree are expected to stay silent.

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  5. you've said it perfectly. i no longer refer to myself as a feminist since these women that you're talking about have taken it and turned it into something that i do not want to be associated with at all. love this post--thanks for sharing!

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  6. I love this. You don't need to apologize at all. The whole feminist movement really gets me fired up. I think the people who support these "wear pants to church" and "go to priesthood session" ladies don't get it either. My relief society president just showed me this quote on Sunday from the "Daughters in My Kingdom" book: Sheri Dew said, "Sisters, some will try to persuade you that because you are not ordained to the priesthood, you have been short-changed. They are simply wrong, and they do not understand the gospel of Jesus Christ." It's as simple as that. I think you're great.

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  7. I can see what you're saying in this post, but I do have to express that it makes me really sad that you would say, "you don't like it, there's the door." We all have our own personal struggles, yet Christ always is ready to accept us and make up for our shortcomings. Even though I don't agree with this group of women, they still need to be loved. The gospel is the ultimate thing that will offer that love, and we as members need to do our best to provide that love. I'm not wanting to attack or debate by posting this, it's just a thought I had. :)

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  8. Wooooah. Sh** just got real. Don't you dare apologize to anyone. Granted, we are all extremely proud of being women, and that's great for us (Fertile, curvy, and feminine... Raise the roof.) Something else I'm proud of? Being able to write on a blog and being entitled to share my opinions and ideas with anyone who's interested in reading them. What is the world's problem with respect? We're not all authorities on Christlike attributes and who is anyone to tell you that you're not being like Christ? Since when has that sort of judgement on us been under jurisdiction of the other members of the church, anyway? Meg, dear Meg, keep writing. Not that you need that encouragement (maybe you do, maybe you don't), but I hope you don't feel like others have any sort of right to shame you out of speaking your mind on, oh, what's that? YOUR BLOG. For the record, both the nurturing of spirits (motherhood) and the priesthood (the boys part, you guys) hold equal standing in God's eyes. We share responsibility in making the world a better place with both of these God-like qualities. We are here to lean on each other. Off my soapbox.

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  9. I'm back. I have a couple of issues with your comments. The first of which is how patronizing the "oh, how I adore contradiction!" comment is. Who is anyone to say that these women don't understand the gospel? Sure, they may have a different understanding than you do or than I do, but I think that's awesome. Personal revelation is great, isn't it? It's not up to you or I to decide whether or not their understanding of the gospel is any less valid than yours or mine is.

    I can think whatever I want about women who want the priesthood, but the minute it stops being okay is when I label them as apostates or look down at them smugly with my own equally imperfect understanding of the gospel because I consider their human thoughts, experiences, and relationship with God completely less significant or righteous than my own.

    The second thing. You compared to the priesthood to motherhood. Wouldn't the opposite of motherhood be fatherhood? I have never wanted the priesthood in my life, but it makes me sad that fatherhood gets lost in the mix. I don't understand the logic on that statement. I know it's not you-- that's something the church frequently says, but it's just something I don't understand and tend to leave alone.

    I hope you know I don't mean offense by any of this. I also hope you can see that "if you don't like it, there's the door" is SO painful to hear. I'm a Mormon that believes that gay marriage is okay...I've heard that statement so many times. It's a soul-crushing thing to hear. Please don't say it.

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    1. I believe the kind of motherhood they are referring to relates to being the one to carry and volunteer your body as a place to grow and nurture your child. They aren't undermining the role of fatherhood, just the fact that women have the sacred ability to bear children, while men have the sacred ability to hold the priesthood.

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    2. Couldn't have said it better myself. I completely agree. THANK YOU!!!

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  10. I completely agree with you! I was just reading a conference talk from October 2001 by Sheri Dew called "It is not good for man or woman to be alone", she talks about how we were created enough alike to love each other but different enough to unite our strengths and become a whole. it is an amazing talk!

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  11. I can't tell you how much I love this post. And I understand what you're saying about the "there's the door" thing. You're not saying just to leave because of a difference of opinion. You're saying if that different idea is so consuming that you can no longer find peace and understanding with your faith, maybe it's time to seek peace elsewhere. And again, that doesn't include everyone. It just includes the people who are so angry that they begin to dislike the leaders and doctrine of the gospel.

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  12. Preach it girl! I know there are far and wide opinions on this, that everyone is entitled to have, but I am totally put off by Mormon feminists. One thing I love about our church is the constant truth we hold fast to. Nothing about our beliefs is going to change because of a group of feminists.

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  13. I totally agree with your opinion that women who think they're being short-changed by not holding the priesthood don't understand. It's not like we're not ALLOWED to know what goes on during the Priesthood session - everything is made available for anyone to watch after it's over, and it's the same for men and the Relief Society Broadcast.

    Thank you for entitling your post "A wordy explanation but not an apology." You should never apologize for having an opinion. It was pointed out to me recently how frustrating it is that it feels like only people of a certain opinion are allowed to voice it without being eaten alive. Frankly, I was relieved to read that another young female person sees feminism and equality and equal opportunity the same way I do. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one left. We can be treated similarly, but we can't be treated exactly the same because we're NOT exactly the same. Like we always say in the teaching world, "fair isn't equal."

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  14. but really...there IS the door. this is your blog. LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT LADIES. the end.

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    1. It's not appropriate to tell anyone that they should leave the church just because they have an opinion that is different from yours.

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    2. I'm actually referring to whether or not you choose to stay and read Meg's blog, as I clearly stated. Freedom of speech is a wonderful thing as I can see you agree.

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  15. A-stinking-MEN. Having the priesthood is a gift, even for men. We were given our gender roles for a specific purpose, and that's how it has and always will be.

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  16. you inspired me (as in the literal form of inspiration. not the "oh, i want to be like her!" kind ;)) to write a post about this. nicholeandryan.blogspot.com

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  17. Hi... my name is Allie and I live under a rock, because I had no idea this was even a thing.

    I like your honesty. I don't claim to know anything (because I don't), but women asking for the priesthood makes me think of men lining up to ask why they can't bear children. Does it really matter? If that's God's plan, why do we feel the need to challenge it?

    Why are people so mean? "No offense, but you're wrong and unChristlike and since I hate your opinion I'll smash you to bits." Oh, you're right. Let me be more like Christ and chastise you for sharing your opinion.

    I always take it too far. Meh, whatevs. Can't win 'em all.

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  18. It really just breaks my heart to read this post because I know this is an attitude that is so common in members of the church.

    We believe that we are members of God's church, yet we call HIS children moronic for having different opinions than us, for standing up for things they believe in, for following their own revelation, for wanting to make a difference that they feel is important.

    Jesus' central message was love, acceptance, charity, compassion. Why is it so hard to listen without fear and judgement to what our sister's have too say, to put down our guards and hear the pain in their voices and ask why they feel that pain.

    There's a primary song that says "If you don't walk like most people do, some people laugh and stare at you, but I won't. I won't. I'll walk with you, I'll talk with you. That's how I'll show my love for you." Christ's Gospel is really that simple.

    Sometimes snark, wit and humor are called for (reasons why I've enjoyed your posts, Meg) but this topic calls for something different. People are hurting, and calling them morons does help.

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  19. oh my dear Meg. You are the BEST! completely agree with everything! Don't ever apologize for anything.

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  20. Let's be adults. It's a vagina and a penis. They aren't bad words. They are biological terms to describe different sexual organs.

    You obviously don't know what this is about or you would know it's not a protest. They are faithful members, otherwise they would leave. Also, for you to suggest that people should leave just because you don't like their opinion is un-Christlike.

    To suggest they haven't done research is moronic. I'd bet that most of these women have studied more about the church than you have.

    And just for the record: motherhood =/= priesthood!

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    1. haha, you really think meg is afraid to say vagina and penis? right. of all people.

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    2. hahahahaha someone fetch that woman an inhaler!

      you rock, meg! (along with this amazing post!)

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    3. hilarious. i don't think m&lisa gets what you are saying at all. too bad, so sad.

      keep on having an opinion meg because as everyone who is against your post has been saying, YOU ARE ENTITLED TO ONE. damn. preaching to the choir.

      ok, i'm done :)

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  21. So I'm definitely not trying to be rude here. I respect that you have an opinion and you should be able to share it, just like the feminists you are talking about. They are expressing their opinions and feelings just like you are. Who is anyone to say that they don't understand the church? NO ONE completely understands the church. I also love how you say that women should be whatever they want,these women are doing what they want, and you're telling them that they're wrong? Never have I wanted to hold the priesthood, but I respect these women for doing something about an issue that they care about. Power to them. I think they rock. And also I love your style.

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  22. amen. you said everything i have wanted to say but didnt have the guts. if people get offended then that is not your fault. we have gender roles for a reason. and we are equal to men. never once have i felt like men were so superior to me because they have the priesthood. we still get those same benefits of having the priesthood in our lives.

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  23. For what it's worth I completely agree with you Meg. Those women that think they need the Priesthood in the name of equality really need to look at the Doctrine of the Church and it would all make clear sense. Some people. But kudos to you! :)

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  24. I like this, and I agree with your opinion. You're sassy and it's awesome. Don't let the peeps that can't handle the sass make you sad.

    I think this encapsulates what you, and I, and those who think like us feel. It's worth the watch.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QYlDLChzig

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  25. I think an interesting view point to look at this issue from is how administering the priesthood gives men a duty in the church and gives them something to live up to. Women are really good at organizing and getting things done and it would be interesting if they were given the role to administer the priesthood, what would happen to the men, would we need them in the church? (It's important to remember we all HAVE the priesthood, the men just administer it.) Anyway, that was just a thought I had.

    Your blog is fun to read! Thanks for the post!

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  26. It shocks me to read these comments and read all the people that disagree with you and say "How dare you say we don't understand the religion." Well, clearly, they don't. If they had faith, they would have faith in God having all of these standards for us for a REASON. It's comical, really. I appreciate you standing up for the religion. It's sad that there has to be opposition in all things....literally.

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  27. Love this post! You are so right! All the comments contradicting you, talk about how these women are entitled to their opinions. But when your opinion goes against the doctrine of the Church, its time for you to pray for understanding and the change in yourself and not the church! These women who are involved in that movement should at least have their temple recommends taken away for participating in such nonsense.

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