oh, baby.

8.11.2014

What a relief & complete joy it is to finally let the secret out about our tiny person. I learned that I am really terrible about keeping my own secrets.

McKay got called into work on the fourth of july & I was instantly mopey. Mostly because of my spiking hormone levels & because I take holidays very seriously. Most of my family was either working or out of the country (ahem, Bri.) I threw myself a high quality pity party- netflix binge & tears included.

To my luck, we live within a few miles of Target. I took myself & my yoga pants to visit my retail boyfriend. Weaving through each isle, I found myself staring at the pregnancy tests. I wanted to believe that my crazy emotions weren't entirely my fault. (I mean, sure I've got a healthy dose of crazy in my blood but I was weeping over everything.)

McKay & I never had a life-altering spiritual confirmation that we needed to start a family or anything too spectacular which I was sort of expecting for some reason. Perhaps because bringing a new person into this world is a big deal. Regardless, in mid-June we mutually felt like having kids wouldn't be the worst. We felt content with the idea of a tiny person chewing on our furniture & ripping up the house. I just made our future baby sound like a puppy. Oops. We decided to stop preventing but we weren't worrying about getting pregnant right away.

Back to Target. I knew that if I was pregnant, I couldn't be more than 3 weeks & a few days. I quickly researched which test would be most likely to pick up HCG levels so early. It was a long shot but I bought a three pack of First Response tests.

Because I have a bundle of nieces & nephews, I browse the baby clothes sections on the regular. I found a pair of high-waisted baby girl shorts on clearance that I fell love with. Though I adore my nieces, I had to keep these for myself. *Note, if it is a girl, it's fate because of these shorts. If it's a boy, he will still be adorable in these shorts. (I'm joking. I think.)

Upon checking out, the cashier asked if I was hoping for a positive test which seemed a little invasive but I said yes. She proceeded to tell me how she always hopes it's negative because she already had three kids with three different daddy's. So you know, good choices on all accounts. I wished her a good day & a lifetime of negative tests.

You already know this part of the story. I peed on the test (& surprisingly missed my hand. TMI but you know, it was a worry) I was anxious.  If you have been reading this blog for a while, you might remember that this isn't our first pregnancy. April 2012, 3 months after we got married, we unexpectedly got pregnant. It was terrifying because we didn't feel ready. I miscarried at 13 weeks. It broke my heart because just out of my first trimester, I had committed myself to being a mother. However, we weren't ready for that baby so I know that our Heavenly Father had our & that baby's best interest in mind.

This time, waiting for the test result, the anxiety I was feeling wasn't the same as the last time. I was excited & hoped for a positive. I flipped the test & saw the faintest pink line. I peed on another. The same faint line appeared. I thought maybe I was hallucinating because you know, I had been a crazy person all week. I ran the last test under water so I could compare.
I totally freaked out & danced around the house. I thought about doing something cute or witty to tell McKay about the bun in the oven (like putting an actual bun in the oven.) I couldn't wait, because I'm bad at secrets. I called McKay while he was at work while calculating our due date. It was sort of miracle I remember when I started my period last because I normally try to forget. June 9. I only remember because that was the day I was flying out to Houston & I was cursing my ovaries.

McKay didn't answer. I called a million times. I called Bri, but she was in England & it was the middle of the night, so she didn't answer. I called Lexi, because she is my proxy husband & she didn't answer. Excuse me people, this is a huge deal & where the crap is everyone? That is what I was thinking.

After the trillionth call to McKay, he answered.

"Hi honey, I have an idea."
"Oh?"
"So, in March, let's have a baby."

In that moment, I realized that I was really lame but we were so excited. The worst 4th of July turned into the best. Not only because we found out about our peanut- tangent, I once thought that calling a growing baby a peanut was weird but now I think it's adorable. tangent over.- & because McKay's work had an extra ticket to the Stadium of Fire.
New baby. Handsome husband. Carrie Underwood. Fireworks. Dippin Dots. It was a really wonderful 4th of July. We are so excited! I just could pee my pants, which also might just be the pregnancy talking.

9 comments :

  1. I'm seriously over the moon for you two.
    Also, this was the best just-found-out-we're-pregnant story I've ever read.
    So thanks.
    Also, WAHOOOOOOOOO!

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  2. Meg, I am so excited for you two! I have followed you for a while, and came back and re-read a lot of things during my miscarriages, and almost cried last night when I saw your announcement! You guys deserve this wonderful experience! :)Hope everything is going great!

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  3. This is the most exciting news! So happy for you! And I agree with Lex! Best story ever!

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  4. CONGRATS! Such exciting news!!

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  5. home skillet you're beaming in that picture. and it's obvious why. i'm still just so excited for you i could DIE.

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  6. I am so excited for you guys!! Congrats!

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