the time I made my BFF choose between me & dieting. Spoiler: she chose me.

9.20.2014

There have been multiple times this week when I realized that life doesn't suck so I thought I would put them here. As always. In list form because we know I left my formatting skills on campus, over a year ago. OOPS.

+ Lex is significantly healthier than I. I mean, she buys baby carrots in bulk, guys. I know that for a fact because I helped her unload her groceries. I'm not talking about the big bag from your local grocery store- I'm talking the costco size. She's that person. I'm the person that goes to costco to buy fruit snacks in bulk so really, we are the perfect couple. She encourages me to be healthy & I give her a fruit snack in return. That is neither here nor there. I'm going to blame another thing on this baby I'm hosting (not like a parasite but like a cute bug, such as a potato bug. I need to focus.) The baby makes me eat certain things. I really don't have a choice in the matter. McKay was a work & that sort of only leaves Lex who is near by to tolerate my cravings. Baby (I) demanded Tucanos. For those who are not from Utah or maybe are vegetarian for some unknown reason, it's a place that dowses you in wonderful lean meats & spectacular mashed potatoes. It's really better than Disneyland. I gave Lex an ultimatum (I'm really a good friend, people), dieting or our friendship. We spent the evening dining over fine food & enduring the meat sweats for the next two days.

+ After laser-tagging with my family, I was driving home with Melanie (mother-in-law) when All About That Bass came on. She replied, "OOOO. I love this song." That was really great. She's so hip.

+ I had my first & serious realization that I am about to be responsible for another person which sort of led me to start padding the walls with industrial grade pillows in our apartment & upgrading to a new security system. None of that is true, but I did think about it. Bri (who has four children under the age of five) was able to calm those nerves with a lot of wise words including "really, all you need is a blanket, binky & a boob." I'm going to Target to buy those things. Minus the boob. I've got some to spare.

+ I am grateful for toilet paper. Especially when it's midnight & I think we are out but realize we have one roll left. You see, I pee in the middle of the night between 3 & 4. Every night. My urinary system is as dependable as the mailman, but she still delivers on holidays & weekends. So basically, I am more dependable than the US postal service when it comes to peeing in the middle of the night. Also, that was earlier in the week so now we are really on our last roll which is concerning. I'll also pick that up at target.

+ McKay is athletic. I am not. I got hit in the face during t-ball practice as a child & have stayed away from that whole industry since. I am now, by default, a SF Giants fan. For those who are like me, that's a baseball team & their color scheme is based on Halloween. *Note, I have also been a Yankee's & Red Sox fan briefly due to past relationships. Those sporty people reading this probably want to light me on fire but that's okay, we probably wouldn't be friends anyway if you know the difference between teams. McKay taught me all of the MLB teams. I was originally going to say all of the baseball teams in the US, but did you know there is a team in Canada that plays in the American League? That feels so wrong but luckily I don't care enough to do anything about it- like write the President. By the end of our baseball trivia, I was able to name (most) of the teams & McKay was impressed. So I'm grateful I can still impress my husband by my very athletic routes.

+ There were dozens of pirates outside of Krispy Kreme yesterday. Probably not actual pirates but you never know. I'm glad I have friends that I can ask & they will know exactly what is going on. If anyone needs to know Krispy Kreme's itinerary, ask Cailey Haynie. She'll know because she knows everything.

2 comments :

  1. Aww, I was off of the blog scene for a while and come back to find you pregs! How precious!

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  2. Thanks for being twenty-something and without children (sorta) who buys fruit snacks for herself. I'm not a dingus! Also, I feel obligated to say that I've been a vegetarian since birth (minus a hot dog in 1997 and a steak in 2013) and I'm giggling over meat sweats. #explain?

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